Are you tired of consuming blogs and youtube videos of tips on how to conceive without getting to the core? This is the exact episode for you.

Carolina gives you the number one thing you need to take care of in your fertility journey. This one aspect is not talked about in your doctor’s visits or addressed with your fertility medication.

What you’ll learn:
1:34 What no one will say about conceiving
2:50 My fertility struggles
3:06 Why is the connection between mindset and emotions important
3:30 How to know what is blocking you
6:10 Ways to address your emotional wellness
8:42 Feeling safe
12:30 Importance of building an emotionally safe relationship with someone

Let’s talk all about your emotions! Your feelings are a vital part of your conceiving journey. Tag me on your social media and tell me what you think!

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Professional bio
The Carolina Sotomayor Podcast is brought to you by Carolina Sotomayor and the Fertility Foundation.

Carolina Sotomayor is an Expert Womb Healer who helps women conceive by removing physiological blockages with Reiki. She is the host of the Carolina Sotomayor Podcast, a show that covers everything from fertility to postpartum to motherhood, and the creator of Fertility Foundation Collective, an online membership that helps women heal at their own pace to boost their fertility.

Carolina has served over 500 women from around the world to heal. She is passionate about helping women create their families. As a result, there are over 60 reiki babies in the world.

Fertility Foundation Collective: https://carolinasotomayor.com/membership
Carolina Sotomayor Reiki: https://carolinasotomayor.com/
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Full episode transcript:

Hi, I’m Carolina, your Wiki Master Umum healer and podcasters. Before we dive into today’s topic, I wanna thank all of you for listening and subscribing every week. I wanna personally thank Jacqueline R for leaving us a five star review on Apple Podcasts.

And I just love seeing all of the kind words you are giving us. Um, my team and I are just so excited to put out this podcast twice a week, every week to support your fertility, pregnancy, and postpartum. Goals, and it’s literally one of the best things I’ve ever done in my Reiki career. So thank you so much for all of your support.

So today we’re talking about something that is super important to me and it’s not talked about enough, and this is what no one will say about conceiving Drum roll please. Fertility is much more than your body working the way it’s supposed. It’s the whole picture of your wellbeing and your wellbeing is really predicted, in my opinion, by two things besides your physical body, your emotions, and your mental state.

Or some might say mindset. And your mindset and your emotions are so entangled, right? So what nobody will say about conceiving that it’s really the motions. That we need to look at. There’s gonna be doctor visits, there’s going to be medications, there’s gonna be fertility, yoga, all of the things to help your body.

And even some might touch upon emotional support, but nobody’s really talking about wearing your emotions. Should be headed, what kind of mindset you need to have during conceiving and how to handle all of the bumps that could occur on your journey. Conceiving my son wasn’t easy. My pregnancy was absolutely one of the hardest things I’ve had ever gone through.

My birth was very difficult. My postpartum was the most trying thing I had to ever come out of, and Reiki helped me do that. But the core of all of those things, my emotions were what was really driving the train. So, That’s what I wanna talk about today is your mindset and your emotions, and why is that important and how to go ahead and look at for the things that come up while you’re conceiving, literally what is blocking you.

is really what I wanna start with first. How do you know what is blocking you anytime in your life that you’re seeing, like perhaps like resistance to do something. Or you’re procrastinating or avoidance. I want you to look into why you’re avoiding it. What is the resistance? Is this something that you should avoid?

Meaning like once you get down to the why or so, this is this like not the right thing for me. What is my body telling me and how do I really feel about. The service level emotions are just that. They are the symptom that you should start with and then start to unravel so you can get to the root cause.

And when we are resistant, some women are resistant to go to a fertility specialist cuz may they are maybe not ready for the answers that they may receive. The root cause of that is, And feeling unsafe and we’re gonna come back. You’re gonna see a theme of feeling unsafe. The next thing after the symptom, you recognize the symptom and you start to question yourself is also to understand where do you feel that emotion?

A lot of my clients that I work with, I have to teach them. And it comes with time, is the connection between emotion, your, your mind, and your body and understanding where do you feel the emotion in your body. For example, um, if there’s a traumatic event you might hold on to perhaps there’s anger, rage, maybe feelings of abandon.

Regarding a certain situation, you can hold those emotions from that event in different parts of your body could be in your throat. So when you think of the event, does your throat chakra close up? Do you feel a tightness or do you feel lump in your throat? Emotions live in our body if they are not release.

And these emotions can block us. They can block us from abundance. They can block our fertility. They can block sometimes complicate our delivery, complicate our fertility. They can cause disease, people who stuff their words or they bite their tongue too much, they can end up having thyroid issues because that chakra is not able to be exercised.

So really what I’m trying to say here is what nobody’s actually gonna really tell you about conceiving, cuz your emotional health is. One of the most important things you can address when you’re conceiving and how you want to address that is really up to you. Perhaps talk therapy, perhaps talk therapy and acupuncture.

Perhaps reiki, perhaps learning a modality yourself. To allow your, your emotions to be released much more quickly. You can learn cutting your cord, sweeping your energy. You can learn, um, how to cleanse your energy with sound like with sound bowls or tuning fork. There’s so many things. Crystals work out as well.

Breath work is probably the best thing. It’s the cheapest because breathing is free. So just a little humor. So, Taking a step further as to what the emotional blockages that are when you are conceiving really are not that different from human to human, from mom to mom, and the symptom or the specifics of the situation in which those root causes are related to are.

for example, ancestral trauma. Generational patterns vary greatly from person to person, but the root cause really are not that different. Some of the root causes could be feeling safe, , feeling emotionally safe, having all of our needs met, and that one’s a big one, but feeling safe. Really is actually the largest root cause.

If people felt safe, how would they make decisions differently? So if we’re looking at, say, ancestral trauma, and it could be so many things as to what the ancestral trauma is, it could be ancestral trauma and generational patterns can appear as. Trying to control rage. Could be neglect, could be abandonment.

There was one client I worked with and, uh, herself, her mom and her grandma all had married multiple times. So this was a pattern of behavior, but the root cause of it is that they felt never seen and they never felt heard. and they never felt safe in any of those relationships. So that was a repeated thing.

But for those women, also, a repeated generational pattern was emotional and intimacy not allowing themselves to go so far as to be seen because it was too scary cuz they didn’t feel safe enough. So feeling safe, how to know what you. Feeling safe and knowing what feeling safe to you means emotionally only can be determined by you.

For me, I felt emotionally safe. When I married my husband. I felt seen. He nurtured me. I learned to say no in my marriage. He taught me it was okay to say no. And then emotional safety. It really allowed me to come out of my shell completely and to be a hundred percent myself unapologetically. And how that looked was knowing that I was going to be loved and held no matter what, and that intimacy and that emotional wellness between us was so strong.

So for me, knowing that I can have long conversations, that he has enough patience for me when I’m having these hard conversations and that our relationship’s not gonna end because if I had hard conversations before, in past romantic relationships, they seem to have ended. So if a person wants to know what emotional safety is, it’s knowing that you’re gonna be held and you’re going to be listened to and seen, and your words matter.

That when you speak, you’re gonna be listened to, and if there’s action that needs to be taken, then it is gonna be taken by whomever is impacted or listening to you. It’s also knowing that even if the hard conversations are going to happen, that they are not interrupted, that they are held and they’re actively feeling known.

In that emotional safety, I don’t think is found in every relationship. I know that to be true. Not every person knows how to be such a safe place for each person, and I had to actively learn how to be an emotionally safe person for my spouse. I had to actively work on being an emotionally safe place for my.

I don’t know honestly, if I’m an emotionally safe place for every person in my life, I try to be, but you never know what someone else’s triggers are. I actively try to ask my friends, is there anything I can do to be a better friend for you? Is there anything I can do to make you feel heard? in a better way.

And I do this periodically and it’s very casual and it’s with my closest friends. Is there anything I can do better to make you feel loved? Is there anything I can do to better serve you? And these are not direct questions in regards to emotional safety, but they are direct questions or a intimacy which goes hand in hand with the safety.

So let’s wrap this up. , what no one will say about conceiving. Is that your emotions matter. They matter in every way. How you feel them, how you release them, how you communicate them to another person, having a person that is an emotionally safe place for you to share your emotions with is absolutely critical.

During this very vulnerable process, there’s nothing more vulnerable of a process than a woman trying to consider. Perhaps maybe birthing that person that you’ve waited so long to conceive. It’s really important to understand how you build an emotionally safe relationship with someone, is actually having the hard conversations and is really up to you.

And not every person is going to be an emotionally safe place for you to communicate your fertility, pregnancy, birth, or even postpartum. Issues with, I would probably say my mom is not an emotionally safe place for me for all my issues. My husband is, I have a few friends that are, but not every person knows how to be or hold space for another.

In that way, it doesn’t pass judgment. That doesn’t interject, that doesn’t project. Then actively knows how to support someone that’s going through potentially traumatic experiences. I think that that’s a skillset that is learned, and I hope you know that if you need a safe place to voice or if you need support, you can always send me a message on Instagram at the Carolina sy.

Send me a voice note, I’ll respond. I think it’s important to know that this journey is hard, but you shouldn’t have to do it alone. So what no one will say about conceiving is that your emotions and your mindset matters and your emotions, they need to be taken care of. Until next time, my friends know that you’re loved.